Well, I fought a war you know, yes against the Germans. No I don't like the Germans; bunch of "Krauts" the lot of them.
Well I live in a hotel in Torquay. Fawlty's the name of the owner, lovely fellow, always gets me the morning papers. Certainly not the worst place I've stayed in, no no no there’s a place in Eastbourne. They've got the strangest thing I've seen, a talking moose. Thought it was Japanese but turned out to be Canadian. Clever people.
Never married, no, knew a girl once though, I must have liked her I took her to see India...at the Oval. Yes, yes Surrey needed 33 runs from 6 overs... er anyway er never saw her again. She got up half way through to er power her hands or some woman thing, and she never came back!!! Funny thing was all the way through she kept referring to the Indians as "niggers", no I said those are the West Indians, these are "wogs". I do wish I could remember her name she's still got my wallet
I enjoy a good drink every night, around about six when Fawlty opens the bar, I occasionally have a gin now and again, or a bottle of red wine with my dinner. I enjoy reading, the morning papers mostly; the Telegraph is great for the cricket.
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