Randy

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..-------- ------------- href="http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vcGhvdG9idWNrZXQuY2 9tLw==" target="_blank" -------------------- I was born in Hawaii.I was harvested and shipped to Windsor Ontario Canada. I miss my folks even though I don't remember them very well, but dont be sad for me cause this place ROCKS!!!! I have learned many things having to grow up fast, and i would love to share my adventures with you. I will offer you advice from time to time. Even tell jokes. Hopefully you will share some with me. Talk to ya later!............. Ok its later! I will start off by telling you how i came to be the cute and cuddly that I am today. Originally I was just an ordinary pineapple shipped to a grocery store and put into a bin for an almost certain death, But as luck would have it, an elderly man purchased me and brought me home. His name was Yado and he was a kind and loving, magical old gent. Yado looked exactly like that Yoda guy from Star Wars except he wasn't green, or short,and he didn't speak in backwards riddles. But he did have alot of hair growing out of his ears and nostrils. He also spoke in a strong accent. Anyhow. back to the story. Yado just could not bring himself to eat me, instead he cast a magical spell on me to bring me to life. Sounds crazy I know. Yado named me Pineappio, you know the story about the wooden doll. Yeah same idea, Later I changed my name to Randy because nobody would take advice from someone called Pineappio (thats just stupid). Now pay attention! Yado taught me everything, and i read alot of books , now I am full of info and I want to help.(long story short) Time passed on and sadly so did Yado, but he left me all his money and wealth of knowledge. After he died I became very depressed and turned mute,(that means I didnt talk anymore) for I had nothing to say. I was picked up off the street and given to a Value Store,and put on a shelf to be purchased. It didn't talk long I was bought by the Jones family and went to live with them. A little time passes and i ended up in a dreaded Yard Sale. When I think of it, I have lived with many families after Yado passed, but none of them were similar or equal to the environment Yado exibited to me. Eventually I left Windsor, stuffed myself in a Greyhound storage compartment and head to New York . I landed a job at a popular mens magazine. There I spread my knowledge right there on the pages! But a problem arose, an Editor named Frida fell deeply in love with me(i can't help it I am very cute)I was in love with her too because she had a strong accent that reminded me of my Yado.Anyway we were caught in the stock room, THOSE DAMN SECURITY CAMERAS ARE EVERYWHERE! Well after that I had TO BE LET GO!!. Then they had the nerve to replace with with a far less cute and adorable Pineapple, I mean he is just plain ugly (NOT THAT I JUDGE OTHER GUYS LOOKS OR ANYTHING), I am just saying he was not good looking.I left New York, and unfortunately so did Frida. Her fellow employees would not let it go. They would tease her and call her names like "FRIDA THE FRUIT FUC...umm FRUIT LOVER". To be cont.............. HERE IS ONE OF MY LIFE CHANGING ADVENTURES............. Some time ago when I was hanging around with the wrong crowd..(YOU SEE MY SO CALLED FRIENDS WOULD BRING ME PLACES, BUT I THINK THEY JUST USED ME TO PICK UP CHICKS BECAUSE I AM SOOOO CUTE) Anyway, we were driving around causing trouble, when all of a sudden our car broke down on the side of the highway, we were not worried cause we were close to home. So here we are two guys and a pineapple, Then to our enjoyment a car pulls over to help us. It had Michigan plates on it, and three girls inside..MINT!!! They ask us if we needed a ride so we jumped in.(I got thrown in the back by the speakers and jammed up against the rear window but I don't hold grudges) Any way the girls were trying to find a exclusive party on some back country road in the middle of bum f**cked nowhere, and they could not find it. So of course I could help cause I know many things and I also knew pretty much where they needed to go. (And so we set off for the destination).And they took us to the party with them. When we arrived there are many many cars in a field, and a big tent with loud music thumpin, people were everywhere. (Ok this is the mean part). What we did not know was that there was a 20 dollar cover charge to get into this party. I had no coin on me nothing, no moolah, and my friends didn't want to pay my way in. Instead they wanted to pick me up and throw me over the fence and into the tent (I guess they thought that would be funny). One of the girls said 'I can shove you down my top and sneak you in ,I am flat chested I have lots of room" (I did not want to do that , I mean I hardly know this girl). I said no to the offer. As they went in I walked sadly, tearfully back to the car. I was blue (sigh). As I was sitting in the car watching crowds of people walking by wearing glow bracelets and having fun, I notice people slapping themselves... I found this to be odd. I rolled down the window only to hear people complaining how bad the mosquitos were. A light bulb appeared above my head and I thought I can help.( earlier when I was pressed up against the rear window on the way over, I had noticed a can of Mosquito repellent under the rear seat).I picked it up, and went outside. I asked the people if they wanted a spray, but I also said it will cost you a dollar for it. Not one person complained about the price and everyone stood in line to get a douse and soon I had more than enough to buy my way in. I even had money to buy some munchies and water. THIS IS WHERE AND WHEN I KNEW IT WAS MY DESTINY TO HELP PEOPLE BECAUSE......As I roamed through the crowd later that evening the people whom I had helped earlier in the night would come over and dance with me and they were very loving, hugging and very thankful that I had helped them.AND SO I REALIZED THAT WHEN I HELP PEOPLE IT MAKES THEM HAPPY AND YOU KNOW WHAT?.....It makes me happy too. ------------------------- ------------------------