Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine

About Me

i'm a comedian, writer and musician. i'm not very good at any of those fun and exciting things so i also work retail! in the ark-la-tex i've done shows at The Living Room, Cinema 218, The 360 Theatre, The Jackrabbit Lounge, Phil's and The Comedy Zone. right now i host a weekly comedy show in Texarkana on Mondays at Club Next on Stateline Ave. you should come stalk me. in my spare time i like to grow beards and shave them without warning. yeah... i'm crazy like that. i like to read... words mostly. i love the music. i hate elvis but my cousin loves elvis and i still love her. that alone should tell you what an incredible fucking person i am. i also help nice indie bands get shows in my hometown of Texarkana. hit me up if yr interested on getting in on that action. enough about me....how is life treating you?

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My Interests

.. Myspace tweaks at TweakYourPage.com indie films and music, vintage clothes, poetry, stand-up comedy, vegetarianism, booze, comic books (that's right ladies!) ,booking shows in my hometown, riding my bike so i don't have to buy gas and lots of other things that a manly man like Chuck Norris probably considers "gay".

I'd like to meet:

Boots The Monkey from the hit children's program Dora The Explorer seems like he'd be cool to hang out with. real laid back, you know?
Myspace tweaks at TweakYourPage.com ..

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Music:

aesop rock, fiona apple, band of horses, todd barry, cory branan, broken social scene, built to spill, the championship, clap your hands say yeah, david cross, decibully, dr. dog, el-p, the flaming lips, zach galifianakis, mitch hedberg, the hold steady, iron and wine, lcd soundystem, man man, steve martin, norm mcdonald, midlake, eugene mirman, my morning jacket, will oldham, brian posehn, richard pryor, sage francis, the shins, silver jews, the teeth, rocky votolato, wilco and a majillion more.

Movies:

jesus' son, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, the royal tenenbaums, drugstore cowboy, gummo, being john malkovich, waking life, i heart huckabees, lenny, let america laugh, julien-donkey boy, black snake moan, shaun of the dead, fear & loathing in las vegas, the baxter, buffalo '66, american movie, the life aquatic, the comedians of comedy, that porn i made with your mom, twin falls idaho, easy rider, i am trying to break your heart.

Television:

the sarah silverman program, it's always sunny in philadelphia, greg the bunny, heroes, a little adult swim and that's it. i hate television... or do i?

Books:

a heartbreaking work of staggering genius, on the road, actual air, you shall know our velocity, infinite jest, the catcher in the rye, a million little pieces, whiskey and robots, brief interviews with hideous men, running with scissors, naked, anything by bukowski and lots of stuff by those damn, dirty beats.

Heroes:

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<62GC68i65JAT1Ay09 target="_blank">Myspace tweaks at TweakYourPage.com

My Blog

Sunday Drivers

While fidgeting with knobs I decideI'd rather listen to men talk about Godthan any of the five songs in current rotationon The Mainstream Radio.And I rather listen to jazzthan men with unclear motives...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Sun, 13 Jul 2008 10:27:00 PST

Going All Night Long

I pulled into an all night coffee shopto grab something to drinkand try to remember where I was going.An SUV in the parking lot was yelling at meto "HONK IF YOU LOVE JESUS".I planned on going in ...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Sun, 29 Jun 2008 06:23:00 PST

Songs About Boxes.

The alarm clock tried to tell methat something was wrong.The bed was too "roomy"and I had too much poorly used time on my hands.It's hard to be greaterthan the sum of your partswhen some of your parts...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Fri, 16 May 2008 03:53:00 PST

When Jesus Comes Back.

I hope he has a decent haircut because let's face it... there probably aren't a lot of good hairstylists in heaven and Scott Stapp really "douched up" long hair. Even for Jesus. I think I tried too ha...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Wed, 14 May 2008 04:33:00 PST

Simple Ways to Tell If Yr Living The Bachelor Lifestyle.

"Breakfast in bed" means you fell asleep eating Cheetos at 3am. What's that smell? Who cares! When your boss explains to you that "Beer o'clock" isn't a "real time", you cry a little bit. You'd rather...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Fri, 09 May 2008 03:14:00 PST

The Adventures of Lonely Man!

I can't sleep at night.I think I'll become a superheroand wash myself clean of this time on my hands.I'll set out with the intentionsof stopping evil doers in their tracksonly to find myself in front ...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Sat, 19 Apr 2008 07:49:00 PST

Street Fighter

You never realize that a street isn’t well lit until find yourself walking it at ten o’clock at night. And there he is...He is big and shirtless and he looks like an ape. He’s walkin...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Tue, 08 Apr 2008 03:29:00 PST

Evil.

So yesterday I'm surfing the web and I come across a recent photo of Evel Knievel with Kanye West. I think, "Wow that's cool. I thought Evel Knievel was dead." So today I'm surfing the web and I see ...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Fri, 30 Nov 2007 03:41:00 PST

Thanks, Byron.

This has been the hardest blog I've ever HAD to write. I've tried to do this several times in several different ways. I tried to type it out but I kept backspacing. I tried to say it face to face...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Sat, 03 Nov 2007 06:40:00 PST

Long Overdue

Hi. It's been almost three years since I embarked on my "career" in comedy. If you would have told me then that I would be hosting my own weekly comedy show I would have called you crazy. Then I would...
Posted by Jesse Capps and His Comedy Routine on Tue, 23 Oct 2007 02:54:00 PST