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Vanessa Francis Josephson
moshed into this world on July 22, 1992.
I am bold, my body is pure. I have a gift, I am sure. I learned to love myself before others. I never cared, I suffered. I can't change the way you feel for me. You can't make me what you see. Just making someone smile without moving brings me success, I don't even have to push myself, just try to be the best. I love knowing that there is something bigger to catch, memories and the past only left me with just a scratch. And yet so young, I grew, and I will keep on growing. And with the message God is showing, I am here. Full of fear, shitting myself, I have those who help.
I got it good, I always pictured this, just like it should.
"I'm just ghost to the world, you're one of the living dead. I breathe out carbon dioxide, you breathe in oxygen. I hide while running, you run while hiding. I like to pretend I matter, pretending doesnt matter to you. Exploring is unknown to me, you explore the unknown. Nobody cares when I cry, you cry when nobody cares."
So I've been very distant from social networks. I've been focussing more towards facebook with conversing, myspace being the gateway to my love for music, and twitter for just expressing my concerns and explainations in the everyday life of yours truly. I've been determinded to increase my talents; playing the keyboard, writing lyrics, doodling, even gaining ideas for a clothes line. It's my last year of highschool and I promised myself to get back on key with my future. It's only after you've lost everything, that
you're free to do anything. It's going to be a great 2010.
This past year, I've fell 1,000 leagues under the sea, deeply in love as can be, which led to a tragedy, and something that I can't even fix right now. I'm barely standing really. I'm done looking, searching. I honestlly don't even know what to look for in a person anymore. If it's meant to be, to be at my side, or even for just slight comfort and be a friend, it'll come to me. I've lost ridiculous trust. You all think you're so clever, your case of innocence and getting away with the murder. We're about to grow up and we're settling down with those flaws put aside, and you're going to be all alone. I tried the last time and you tossed me aside, but it won't happen again. I'm done being the only one fighting for anything anymore.
We had a good course, it was a good flight.
I will tell the truth no matter what the ears desire. I don't enjoy judging people though. I won't ever assume. I will always look at you through the inside and out. I can probably bring out the best in you, you just have to work with me. I need that 50/50 dedication. There is nothing wrong with saying what you truly feel or believe. Too many people hold their thoughts inside so they can impress others. That's why everyone loves you, but you can't even love, or even respect yourself. That's the most important part of this whole process. I'm hard on myself so I can exceed,
to be the best that I can be.
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