I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I am Joshua, Dylan and Derek's mom. I am Brian's sister and Bill and Mia's daughter. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees. I write award-winning cookbooks. I don't know how to manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo men with my goddess-like piccolo playing. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines at unflagging speeds, and I cook Thirty- Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in spagetti, a veteran in love and an outlaw in Shady Grove. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play a mean bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Pussycat Dolls, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges using only straws in my back yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair coffee makers free of charge. I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy eveningwear. I dont perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller nine and won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children and animals trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dinning room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Paris, France, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. Im a member in good standing with the Masonic Lodge, Veterans of Foreign Wars, and National Rifle Association. I hold the rank of Captain in the Special Security Service for the Republic of Liberia. This honor was bestowed upon me by the first female head of state on the continent of Africa and current president of Liberia, Her Excellency Mrs. Ellen Johnson Sirleaf. The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I run, I dodge, and all my bills are paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Three years ago I discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I shot J.R. I knew there were no weapons of mass destruction. I breed prize-winning oysters. I have won bullfights in Spain, cockfights in the Philippines, fishing tournaments in both Louisiana and Mississippi, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis. But I have not yet become the mayor of New Orleans.Hey Dudes!! Denise here....often imitated, never duplicated! For those of you that don't know me, should know me! I hate DRAMA, so if ya got.... keep it, I don't want it! I have lived here since my senior year in High School. I lived in Japan growing up. I am half Japanese and half french! Piss me off and I'll cut ya! Kung Fo yo! Know what i'm saying yo? ::::giggles::::So anyway, I love to hang out with friends, and cut up. I love to laugh, and meet new people. Jodie says I never meet a stranger, and I could hold a conversation with a rock! Jodie's retarded!!!
I made this layout with help from pYzam , Look at these other Layouts!
I made this layout with help from pYzam , Look at these other Layouts!
